Sunday 11 March 2012

Do You Come From A Land Down Under?

Before you get righteous on me, I realize Sydney is not in Asia, but we did fly out of Changi Airport so that has to count for something. And if I want to get really technical, there are thousands of Australians in Asia for work or pleasure, and about fifteen billion Asians in OZ for the same reasons, therefore, I can count Australia as Asia. Convoluted thinking?  Sure, but that is what being in a mixture of sun and rain all day does to the brain.


Buying bread from a man in Brussels
He was six foot four and full of muscles
I said, "Do you speak-a my language?"
He just smiled and gave me a Vegemite sandwich

Which brings me to my next points. What is vegemite?  Why do the Aussies eat kangaroo? How come there are so many Flying Foxes terrorizing the CBD in Sydney? How do the girls manage to manoeuvre the city streets in killer heels? And most importantly, is everyone in Australia that darn good looking? They all look like they just stepped off a "Surfer Shoot" on a Hollywood sound set.

He seems too tough to eat
I found everything about Sydney fascinating from the kids partying the night away, to the bikers that roll up on their scooters, to the Aborigines playing didgeridoos, to the grapefruit-sized avocados. 


Sydney is a city with a checkered past and the history of this city is triumphant. Every corner has a tale, every building has a saga, all the churches, parks, tunnels and restaurants revel in their shady past. I wandered through every nook and cranny, taking in so much of the lore, the Sydneysiders said I knew more about their city than most of the locals. 

I took a cautious trip to the Botanical Gardens, not for the flora but a purposeful mission to photograph the Grey Headed Flying Foxes that have made the park their home, much to the disdain of the park officials. They are called often bats, megabats, fruit bats or flying foxes but they all the same animal.  I just call them freaky, bizarre, flying mammals that swooped straight out of a horror movie.

The Flying Foxes hang in groups in the trees
I met an elderly volunteer at the park that took the time to point out the hundreds of Flying Foxes hanging upside down in the trees. She also explained why the bats were not wanted due to the damage and destruction they cause to the ancient, exotic trees. The Foxes serve an important role in Australia. They transport seeds and pollen over a wide region, helping to diversify and regenerate the forests. She also told me the foxes make a horrific noise. While it was kind of her to point out the obvious, it was impossible to miss the intense screeching hundreds of these flying mammals make.


I may be furry, but I am not cute
R2 was born and raised in Mexico City, the largest city in the world. While he hasn't lived there for over twenty years, the city boy hasn't left the concrete jungle  He isn't big on nature, at least the flying, licking, barking or crawling kind. So to see if I could drive him a little "batty" I took him to Nature as sunset approached introducing him to a National Geographic episode in Hyde Park. I never revealed to R2 that the swooping UFOs were not pigeons or Sydney's famous Black Cockatoos. Flying Foxes are huge, their wing span is more than a meter and their bodies can be the size of a small dog. R2 was too busy looking at the sites to get a sense of the impending doom. 


All of the sudden, a huge clap of thunder crashed through the sky followed by streaks of lightening. It was as if I had orchestrated the entire show for him, "Cue the lightening, cue the rain and bring on the bats."  It was at this moment I disclosed the huge flying forms in the sky where not birds but Sydney's famous Flying Foxes. At first he didn't believe me until about five dipped so low he got a face-to-face with them. I haven't seen R2 move that quick since someone told him there were free shots of tequila being offered at the local cantina!  


Yes, I know I have an evil twin but that night, I decided Senor R2 should practise what he preaches to me. So often we are stuck in our comfort zone, unwilling to leave the porch and experience life outside of the familiar rut we often find ourselves in. Since I have met R2, he has challenged me, pushed me and taught me there is a huge world to be discovered if you just take that leap. Every day I leap with some plunges more graceful than others.  Often I fall hard and fast, and it is difficult to not run for the airport and return to the cold and familiar world I know so well. A world that doesn't have bats, spiders, geckos, cockroaches and bizarre smells and foods. We both take this adventure one day at a time.
A view you never tire of in Sydney


That dark and stormy night taught R2 this world is more than uptight hotels and Executive airport lounges. There is more to life than another corporate gig in a city you can't even identify because you go from the airport, to the hotel, to your work. 


R2 now has Layna in Asia directing him to the weird and wacky sites and while I am on a trip of a lifetime he has discovered the same.  "Hang on, it's gonna be a bumpy ride."

33 comments:

  1. At least the bats didnt poop on him!!! its traumatizing! - luc

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. He was scared that was going to happen. Didn't want Toxic Poop on him like Lookie!

      Delete
  2. Some lyric translation:

    Fried out Kombi - a broken-down van. The lyrics are often translated as "Combie," but the correct spelling is Kombi. It came from the VW Kombivan which was very popular in the '60s and early '70s, especially with surfers and hippies.

    Head full of Zombie - Zombie was a particularly strong batch of marijuana which was floating around Australia for a long time. People called it "Zombie Grass."

    Vegemite Sandwich - Vegemite is a fermented yeast spread that is pretty much a national institution in Australia. Some people love it and can't start the day without a piece of toast spread with Vegemite, and some go so far as to carry a small jar of it with them when they travel overseas. Some are indifferent to it, and others can't stand it. It kind of resembles smooth black tar, and is similar in taste to the English "Marmite," but Aussies will always tell you that Vegemite is far superior.

    Regarding the lyrics, "Where beer does flow, and men chunder..." Chunder is Aussie slang meaning to vomit.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Hi Colin, thank you for the translation. Most North Americans make up all sorts of strange words while singing this song and most have no idea what a fried out Kombi is!! I only learned while in OZ. This man explained the entire song, but the problem is, every time I hear the song now, I can't get it out of my head!!! It took two weeks for the words to leave and now they are back.

      Delete
  3. Ok, I like wildlife,after all, as third of three daughters, I became my mountain-man father's "son" and went on many "back to the wild" canoe trips in Northern Canada. I've seen bear, wolves, Moose in rutting season but I would totally be freaked out by these bats!! I am with R2 on this one. "Get me the hell out of here!!" Great blog as always Layna! Hugs from Jacquie

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. "Back to the wild" is ALWAYS better than "Brokeback Mountain" :)

      Delete
    2. Jacquie, I know your stories about Back to the Wild are true, but I just can't picture you in your stilettos hauling a gun around! Thanks for reading as always. Coming from a talented COMM lady like you, it means a lot.

      Delete
  4. A man was walking on Bondi beach one day and he found a bottle half buried in the sand. He decided to open it. Inside was a genie. The genie said," I will grant you three wishes and three wishes only." The man thought about his first wish and decided, "I think I want 1 million dollars transferred to a Swiss bank account. POOF! Next he wished for a Ferrari red in color. POOF! There was the car sitting in front of him. He asked for his final wish, " I wish I was irresistible to women, like Aussies are." POOF! He turned into a box of chocolates.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. OZ Stud, I think your head is full of Kombi. Go eat some Vegemite, Mate!

      Delete
  5. Miss Layna--soon to be famous published author Layna--hanks for continuing to inspire and amaze!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thanks L. It is all the beans I eat here that give me my inspiration! Or sumting like that!

      Delete
  6. i need to visit this place funny blog i furry but not cute is funny

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, whoever you are, save your money and go. OZ is wonderful, beaches, mountains, great weather, fantastic people....I hope he gets another trip there soon.

      Delete
  7. You had me with the cute kangeroo, but bats creep me out - I remember losing my mind when my cat was chasing a little one around my house - had to wake ex-husband no. 1 to capture the little vermin and be the man of the hour - I shudder to think who would step up to the plate if one of this bad boys were flying through my dining/living room and roosting in my grand piano! Hugs, Sista!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Well, at least it wasn't ex husband no 2. He would have caught and sold it to the highest bidder to make money to get to JA. I think if it happens again, you will have to sic TIKI on it!

      Delete
  8. Great story I think we all have, oh my god its a bat stories. But my bats didn't lok like foxes... I can't do mice, rats even though my bother had a pet rat. And I might have had a can we get that mouse that snakes going to eat him. Lol but bats no,no,no. Fur or not. One time I'm up in the north woods with the kids and it dusk my daught had a friend in the cabin playing a board game and low and behold here comes a bat or two. Under the covers we go screaming. I had to be brave, and I hate that so under a sheet with a pan chasing bats... they left, I can only thing that they were just as scared of the lady under the sheet with a frying pan...
    Peg

    ReplyDelete
  9. Love this Peg. I can picture you running like a crazy lady with a frying pan, screaming and bashing at the bats. With these bats, you would have needed a wok, a tennis racquet and a hockey stick - they were that big. I have only seen the microbats. Never anything of this size. Only heard about them from a friend that visited the Amazon and I thought he was exaggerating! Guess Not!

    ReplyDelete
  10. Hey Layna, bats are about as distasteful as vegemite or marmite. We had little ones at Fort San where I worked at the Sask.School of the Arts. They basically were field mice with wings. What was so freaky about them was their erratic flying, echolocation has it's flaws. The myth back then was they would get all tangled up in your hair. Small dog size bats is something I don't particularly want to experience, so if I am ever down under I will avoid the botanical gardens. Thanks for the heads up. I hate anything in large quantities, except money of course!! What are you doing anyway? Why on this adventure and what does R2 do, why do you call him R2?

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. My sister used to attend Fort San so I remember the place well. That place had a lot of strange "myths" including ghosts! Right now, I am on Sabbatical from my job in Canada while my husband R2 works in Singapore (2 years or more). He is an International IT Consultant but often we say SPY. Everyone wants a chance to chuck their boring, mundane day-to-day life and I did it. As for why we call him R2, his name is hard for many to pronounce so to make it easy for English Speakers, he becomes R2.

      Delete
  11. Hey Layna, read the blog, it was a great story and reminded me of the great trip the family took there 10 years ago. We were also fortunate to visit the Botanical Gardens and saw flying foxes in Queenstown.

    ReplyDelete
  12. Ah ha, so you know what I am talking about for size!

    ReplyDelete
  13. stop making me read layna, your driving me crazy with all your wild stories, hope i can get some of my own sometime soon :) - sammmmmmm

    ReplyDelete
  14. You hate to read Sam, so I am honoured you take time from your busy work/university/life schedule to read about R2 and my adventures! Never a dull moment! Tomorrow I am on the hunt for the "Love Seeds" that show up in Singapore in certain areas.

    ReplyDelete
  15. Love the stories Kiddo. Miss you much. You really need to write a book about your adventures....Julie Harrison

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Layna in the Wilds of Orchard Shopping Mall - where only the brave dare to go with their Platinum Cards!!! I can see it all now. The title of my book.

      Thanks for kind words Miss Julie. Miss you as well.

      Delete
  16. Always entertaining Layna. I so wish that I'd actually worked with you before you left. Thanks for writing your stories...I look forward to the next one!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you Andrea. I am so happy you enjoy reading about our adventure in Amazing Asia. There are wonderful people, sights, culture, history, and mustn't forget the food!!! I better start running marathons like you to keep the rice and noodles at bay.

      Delete
  17. Sounds like a great adventure! I know your having fun!

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. You have known me too long Allan. We must be related because "Fun" is our middle name!

      Delete
  18. OMG laughing sooooo hard after reading this one. Poor R2 but that image of him hauling ass with a huge flying fox on his trail is just too funny. This is so well written, really it is.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Thank you my lovely friend. It was funny....I am still in hot water for that little caper but I tell him every experience means a blog! Hugs to you.

      Delete
  19. whew you wouldn't catch me hanging over the edge like that. You are getting to be bigger than Dick Assman or even Scoop Lewry.

    Johnny C.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Dick Assman? No one could get that big! He is a legend!

      Delete