Saturday 2 February 2013

Let the countdown begin

Today was a day for trepidation, sadness, anxiety and excitement. Today was the day I waited with my stomach in butterflies while R2 gave his terms and conditions to his boss, a man he has a great respect and admiration for, however, he still felt it is time for a change from our life on the Little Red Dot. Health, family and immigration must come first.

I love this site
Leaving Singapore is something that has been on our minds for a few months but a part of me tried to ignore the cold, hard facts that there was a high probability we would leave before the full two years. 

There have been so many extraordinary aspects about Asia, and yet there have been so many appalling things from this region that will remain with me for a lifetime. I have seen, smelled and heard noises that still don't seem real to me, coming from small-town, semi-safe, Canada. I have tried to write about the positive experiences we have encountered and leave the shocking stories behind until I am safely away from a nanny state that watches our every move.

Orchids galore in Singapore
When we came to Singapore, we made a decision that we wanted to live in a local neighbourhood for two reasons. The rent in our neighbourhood, while still outrageous, at least did not take the entire paycheque. It left us just enough for an ice coffee at the local hawker station each morning, instead of shelling out $10 in the fancy expat, frappa-crappa-mocha latte that no one seems to blink an eye, as they dash to their air-conned Landrover. We also decided if we were going to live here, we didn't want to try to keep up with the Joneses because it is impossible with the expats that have companies paying $20,000 per month for rent and $40,000 for each child to attend an International school. We wanted to live as residents and have the means to travel most weekends to new countries to see as much of Asia as possible. While we didn't see it all; an impossible feat, we did manage to see dozens of fascinating areas.

While living in a predominantly muslim community, we spoke to many neighbours that told us shocking stories about the treatment of the maids or helpers, as they are often called. We refer to them as Modern-day Slaves. If you think the maids in the book The Help by Kathryn Stockett were treated poorly, you haven't seen anything.

We also lived very close to the area where prostitution is rampant in Singapore. Prostitution is legal in Singapore and controlled by the government in brothels, but for the illegal, underground activity, the Human Trafficking and smuggling of women in Asia is a vicious, competitive and fierce business. These are stories that won't be my typical humorous look at Asia, and I will be safely in another country when I speak of some of the horror of the kidnapped women and children forced into prostitution rings. 

There are also stories to be told on the Inflated Expat Ego Syndrome; an affliction that hits many expats that think the locals are beneath them, and behave in the most unbecoming, obnoxious way. Case in point, out with some friends dancing when a drunken man fondled me, not once, but twice. The second time, it handed him a well placed elbow to his overextended pot belly. To grope or grab anyone in Singapore is a criminal offense that will land you in jail and on the receiving end of a tortuous caning. I noticed the bouncers were watching this exchange so I didn't worry he would touch me or my friends again. He stumbled away, holding his gut, sulking in the corner. Many expats think it is there right to misbehave and they are above the law to any of the strictly enforced laws here.  So why do we wonder why the locals glare at us and hate our very existence? Perhaps it has to do with the inappropriate manner so many behave.

The loveliness of the Botanic Gardens
While I appreciate the orderliness of this country and the symmetry of the structured landscaping, what I will miss the most is the people. I have met more people than I can remember, from so many countries. We are all in the same boat, and my experience with the expat community has been more than I could have imagine. I have not told many that I am leaving, allowing this chapter of Layna In Asia to be my mouthpiece because I find it too taxing to say adieu. There are not enough tissues in Singapore for my soggy tears and snotty sniffles.

Maybe he will let us live with him on a mountain
My 20,000 plus readers have asked if I am continuing the blog, will we still travel and where will we go? R2 is not a Canadian and immigration in Canada is extremely difficult, contrary to what  you are lead to believe; marriage does not make a Canadian, no matter what you have been told. All of these questions are issues that keep me tossing and turning at night. We are nomads up for the offering, a lot like the prostitutes and maids, except we don't have a house or country to return to. We are taking a quick side trip to Cambodia, we are selling our meager possession and we have less than one month to leave this country before we become illegals in a nation that takes their custom and immigration seriously.

I was told under no circumstance should I give up the blog, and I doubt we will stop the travel until one of us becomes incapacitated, "What was your name again?" Layna in Asia may seem strange if we become worker bees in Canada or Mexico, but my promise is to seek out adventures in everything we do, even if it is Layna at the 15 Minute Lube in Prince Edward Island or R2 changing a tire in San Miguel de Allende, Mexico.

Until then,

Cheers and Salud, Singapore

55 comments:

  1. Layna, I wish you and R2 all the best in your next adventure. Thanks for sharing your journey with us!

    Bonnie

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    1. Thank you Bonnie, I am not quite down for the count, maybe one more country...and I will try to make our next stopover as fun and entertaining as Asia has been!

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  2. What a sad story Layna, but a happy one too. I expect there is more to the story. Hmmm wonder where my friends of international travel will be next? Safe travels my friends

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    1. Thank you and I agree - leaving is sad, I have met wonderful people, seen tremendous sites but I know the next adventure will ROCK!

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  3. Yes, I am sad and at the same time, excited for a new adventure. I just wish I could take all of the people I have met with me in my luggage! Too many people that were wonderful...that makes me the most sad.

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  4. NNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. You can't leave, you can't stop writing, we follow you....NNNNNNNNNNOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Promise you won't stop!

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    1. I will try to live in a wildly fascinating place where I can write about scorpions in the loo, rats near the pool, and monkeys that steal beer from your servi bar...oops, already wrote all of that.

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  5. You done it before! You will have friends all over the world! Your blog followers will increase! You can buy a new bike and put new miles on it! Do you know where you are going?

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    1. We have a few ideas of where we are going, but that wouldn't be a surprise - the element of surprise, Dear Watson!

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  6. Not sure how that makes me feel. But wherever you land dear Layna you will be with your love and hopefully closer to your beautiful kiddies.

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    1. Kiddies, oh, I thought you wrote Kitties! R2 is allergic :).

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  7. It's been a magic carpet ride reading about all your adventures! Looking forward to more chapters Layna

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    1. Thank you for getting on that wild carpet with us. I will seek out adventure, even if it means dodging speeding locomotives, fighting pirates in the ocean or just wandering down Yonge Street at 11 p.m!

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  8. Can you say book? Only you make the craziest things hilarious, so entertaining and we want more!

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    1. Just find me an agent, and I will crank out a book, oh yes, and an editor and publisher! Easy!

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  9. Layna, your blog summed up the Singapore "experience" to a T. Unfortunately at the end of the day, it is a transient expat city but doesn't make it easier to say goodbye to wonderful new friends that have come into our lives. You'll be missed here!

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    1. Thank you for your lovely words - I have already met some great people that came and went, when I first arrived. With FB and social media, keeping in contact is easy stuff these days. I can nag my children from 15,000 miles away, just as if I was in the same room!

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  10. yay you are moving closer we can be a family again.

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    1. No matter how far apart you are, the distance that keeps you apart, you are family. Distance will never stop that' that and skype.

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  11. As ACDC says, ``its a long way to the top if you wanna rock and roll``! you guys just keep adventuring and climbing to the top! so much more in store for you and our tiny family


    Loooookie

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    1. Thank you for that Lookie, I will, if you will. You have your entire life ahead of you and I know you will reach the top.

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  12. Don't worry Layna, wherever your travels take you, you will always make friends....you're that type of girl - good luck, we look forward to hearing more of your adventures!

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    1. Thank you for reading and enjoying the adventures of an ExPat, something so many of us are. Who knew there were so many of us out there. We could start our own little island....ExPat World!

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  13. New adventures await - and I can't wait for you to take us along with you! Good luck my friend!

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    1. I hope you all fit in my suitcase. My shoes take up a lot of room but I think I can manage a few of you to come along on our next journey.

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  14. Good luck! Not sure if we'll see you before you leave? ..... Take care and enjoy your future travels

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    1. Thank you and to you as well. Keep Singapore well for me!

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  15. STAY, STAY, STAY.....don't stop writing ever

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    1. Too late, 1st Class plane tickets are booked and I am not giving up those babies. I will continue to write, if you promise to continue to keep reading! Cheers.

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  16. Wow, Layna, I had no idea you were preparing to leave Singapore already! I really enjoyed our brief friendship here and wish you both all the best in your new endeavors! Charge on with gusto (as I'm sure you will)! :

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    1. Charge - I love to charge...oh, I thought you meant on Credit. Thank you - I will charge on and enjoy the next journey!

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  17. Layna - thanks for sharing your life in Singapore with us. Somehow it seemed that you weren't so far away. Those of us in -40 have appreciated being in touch with a warmer "clime"
    I wish you the best - wherever your travels take you. Hope you will continue to include us in your travels.
    Take good care of yourself - and those you love !!

    joan

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    1. I miss seeing you Joan, resucing you from floods, and our monthly wine sessions whilst we discussed condo business. I hope you are well, and I will keep you updated on our next adventure, wherever it takes us.

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  18. Hi Kiddo. I don’t give a damn about Singapore, I do however care about my friends. You and R2 get the hell out and back to North America where you will be a lot closer to family and friends. Yes Layna with your smile, the opportunity to get to know you at least a little at MHI and your writing I consider you a friend and although I have yet to meet your MUCH J better half I definitely look forward to telling him how lucky you are both to have each other. Safe passage, land lightly and live well wherever you wind up.

    Your friends, G & SL

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    1. Thank you G and SL...we are all brother in arms at MHI. I will try to get my buns back to North America (I know Mexico will love us - not so sure about Canada). Be well, and I will let you know where we are headed to, when the plans are finalized.

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  19. Replies
    1. Thank you C. I know, you know this sad feeling of leaving. I only met you once on the Chinese Junk but you made an impression - you were one of the first people I met in Singapore and you left shortly after. We must go where the work is. My best to you as well.

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  20. All the best to you wherever you go. I know you will enjoy every bit of memory here despite the heat. You take care!

    Warm wishes,

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    1. Yes, these are memories I will carry for a lifetime - warm (and hot) memories, for certain. My best to you win Singapore.

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  21. Dearest Layna, if you don't become a writer then i will disown you. i feel like my bestie is the next jk rowlings, things come to life when i read your journals, truly amazing. this talent can not be wasted, you must find a publisher.

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    1. I am glad I was able to share my journey with so many people. Thank you for saying such kind words but you are my bestie and you have to say those words - you have always been in my corner! Love ya. Besos!

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  22. It's been great knowing you.
    Keep up the good work so we can see where you are.
    Take care on your travels and keep safe.
    We will miss you

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    1. I will keep up the good work, as long as I have people not bored to the bone. I shall miss all of the wonderful people I met in Singapore as well - best people seem to migrate here!

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  23. Thanks Layna, for your writing. You have made so much joy in people's life. Keep up the good work. Let's keep in touch. Warm wishes,

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    1. Blush......thank you. Your words mean so much to me, and I am glad you enjoyed our journey through Asia and beyond.

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  24. Do you have any idea how much I have enjoyed following you and living through your stories since you left Canada? Best move you could have made. I am so proud of you, you are so talented and I hope the stories never end. XXXOOOOO

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    1. I will keep the stories a' comin' if you keep a' readin'. Thank you for your support and kind words. My goal is to never stop writing, but hopefully take it to the next level.

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  25. Fabulous Layna...you certainly have a great gift there, as a writer. I am honored to know you but mostly, to call you "My Friend" I wish you & R2 safe travels & landings...hope you make it home again real soon, as we have some unfinished business...lol A few drinks & a few more!!!!! Love yah lady! Be safe please...always xoxoxo C u when I c u : ) xo

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    1. Thank you for your kinda words - maybe a few drinks would make the blog, all the better! Can't hurt to try.XXXOOO

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  26. Good luck Layna! And safe travels..hope you continue with the blogs.

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    1. I will continue with the blog if everyone continues to not be bored to death by them. Thank you for asking!

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  27. I've read another one of your stories of surviving, but I don't think it was Asia. Anyway enjoy your writing.

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    1. Some days I wonder how we survive all of the ridiculous adventures we manage to find ourselves in. On our last trip to Cambodia, we were in a tuk tuk in the seediest, darkest part of Phnom Phen....I told the driver I would pay him to get us out before we were mugged. Horrible area.

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